It pays to avoid shit, by paying to hire non shit.



Nothing like an executive salary to add zest to ones life.



 "Ahhh fuck the customers, I'm busy."


Had to buy an item and the only way to get it delivered was by "gag" - Australia Post.


http://auspost.com.au/business-solutions/express-eparcel.html

"If no one is available when we deliver, we can leave your consignment in a safe place or leave a calling card, so the recipient can collect the package when it suits them"


 The Delivery Instructions:

"Send by plain postage only. NO signature on delivery. No carding."

"If no one is present to accept the delivery - leave near the front door or in the letter box".



What did the supplier do? -  They sent it by Australia Post's eParcel, instead of plain postage, with THOSE instructions printed on the label.


What did the local agent do? They totally ignored the instructions, and applied a Sticker - Refused [X} and Return to Sender.



What did the supplier do then when it got back? They said they would not resend it and they asked me for my details to give a refund.


What did I do? I held them accountable for their fucking it up - I asked for PLAIN POSTAGE - NO signature on delivery. And they fucked that up.

They then said "Oh we will do special delivery if people ask for it."

And I said, "Well that is what I did, and you - you just printed that out on the label  and sent it by e-parcel anyway."


And the the local LPO owner -  refusing to leave the package - as per the directions then marking it "refused" and sending it back?


Call the "Australia Post National Call Centre"? Nope.

If I am going to call idiots, I am not spending half an hour on hold to be fucked around for another half hour and then get hung up on.

And then have to ring up two or three times more, with more long waits on hold, only at best to be told it will take up to 10 days to investigate it, which they won't and then 3 months later they send me a letter saying, "Sorry about not winning the Ipad in the christmas competition..."

If your going to be told to go fuck yourself, like why drag it out?



So I contacted the management with the issue - that way I can get fucked around and be immediately hung up on.


And they did.


So I emailed them with the issue and a copy of the senders photo of the label - and what was printed on it - the "leave it at the door instructions" as well at the eParcel options to leave it at the door, if you so choose... etc...


"I want to complain about my local agent refusing to safe drop my parcel.

They marked it as refused and returned it to sender.
It was the Bumphuk Post Office Victoria 3xox.
I want you to contact the supplier and arrange for a courier to pick it up and have it sent back to me.
Regards
'
Fi-Fi Fluff Mi Foo Foo.



There were a couple in amongst this that had dead end email address's - I forget which.


ahmed.fahour@auspost.com.au - this bounces.
 
ewan.stafford@auspost.com.au - 4 days later - no reply.

richard.umbers@auspost.com.au - 4 days later - no reply.

christine.corbett@auspost.com.au - 4 days later - no reply.

steve.ousley@auspost.com.au - 4 days later - no reply.

chris.blake@auspost.com.au - 4 days later - no reply.

paul.burke@auspost.com.au - 4 days later - no reply.



After 4 days, NONE of them had bothered to contact me, I then RANG THEM and this is what happened.


CEO
Mr Ahmed Fahour
Telephone (03) 9204 7171
ahmed.fahour@auspost.com.au- 

His number does not work any more and his email address bounces.

 
Chief Operating Officer
Mr Ewen Stafford
Telephone (03) 9106 8966


I got hung up on 3 times in a row here - by some chick going mental.


Executive General Manager, Parcels and Express Services
Mr Richard Umbers
Telephone (03) 9106 9724

Message bank and no return calls - ever.


Executive General Manager, Retail Services
Ms Christine Corbett
Telephone (03) 9106 9379

Dead Number.



Executive General Manager, Post Operations Network
Mr Steve Ousley
Telephone (03) 9106 9581

Goes through to a different person.



Executive General Manager, Corporate Affairs and People
Mr Chris Blake
Telephone (03) 9106 7411

3 people use the phone line, no one answers - the answering machine says so.


Corporate Secretary and General Manager, Government Affairs
Mr Paul Burke
Telephone (03) 9106 7114

Not at work.... if ever.


General Manager, External Affairs
Ms Jane Mcmillan
Telephone (03) 9107 0218

Well she left ages ago - but the replacement didn't get the number, or the office and it does not divert to them either

Perhaps they just play musical offices.


With the entire management of Australia Post being this fucking incompetent, it can only get worse in the other departments - and it does.


But in a way they are much better than going through, than the national call centre.

You get told to go fuck yourself in 30 seconds or less.

I mean that is amazing.

This is quality, this is service and this is a huge increase in efficiency and customer satisfaction.

I was completely ignored at every stage of the process, by every one who worked there, with absolutely NO follow up what so ever - Fuck - Australia Post is soooo good.

$20 million dollars of dead wood at the top of the heap and it burns as brightly as soggy shit.

Impressive.

Probably busy at the moment - with their fingers up each others arses, voting to give themselves another pay increase - "All those in favour, please raise their hands.".


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